When I first gave up being on social media I didn’t have a hard time finding things to fill the time of whatever being on social media is. Its because it didn’t really have a solid role in my life. It wasn’t a hobby. Sometimes it felt like a party. It definitely mimicked a family or high school reunion. In its best moments it was an online scrapbook that I never could quite finish.
In any case, since it never really had a genuine or solid purpose in my life personally, it sort of just got replaced with those things that did have a purpose. Life just happened and it was easy to be too busy to make the effort to be back online regularly.
Real Life Over Online Life, Always
When I started a blog I committed to never let it overconsume me the way social media sometimes did. That’s why I take great pride in not doing my blog according to “the rules.”
The first week I missed my self-instilled writing deadline I didn’t notice. An additional week went by and packing for a weekend trip took the place of my usual writing prep. Realizing I became too busy to be online was the very achievement I had always wanted.
I write as I feel compelled to. I type as time permits. When I realized being too busy even to type wasn’t a failure, but actually a positive I was drawn to the thoughts my non-online time provoked.
Focusing on the Joy of Missing Out Helps with the Fear
As someone who used to share my small and large moments online, there is still a void. A feeling as though I’m missing out not letting others know what I’m doing, where I’m going, what I’m achieving. Esteem (importance, recognition, respect), ranks high on the pyramid of basic human needs. So I know where the void comes from.
But self-actualization (challenge, opportunity, learning, creativity) ranks higher – the top.
Focusing on being so enthralled in the joys of everyday life, being too busy to be online, is mindfulness in the 21st century.
Silence Is Golden
There’s something to enjoying a fun weekend with friends, a moment with the kids, or an athletic personal record in the comfort of my own head. In being silent online, I find more fulfillment in the moment.
I’m living a life I love and I don’t care who knows it. After all those who are there with me, I mean, really, really, there with me, not feeling the love through the screen, know it.
There are now times I find myself staring lovingly at friends in special moments. Times I make an effort to focus on breathing while with my kids, taking it all in. To me its all about real life over social media.
I’m Starting To See Straight
This is not a figurative statement. I have double vision. It creeped up sometime during my twenties but only made itself known when I was tired. Therefore, it was limited to moments past midnight playing drinking games or grabbing Taco Bell. Then slowly the world became digital, and eyes prone to double vision compatible are not.
In my college days instant messenger and report writing were the only reasons for screen time. Fast forward to today. 3 young sons and a world that revolves around a need to be online, I’m simultaneously tired and staring at a screen for what feels like every waking hour.
I like to call my double vision the physical cross I bear. It is what it is and I can gain some control over it by limiting my screen time.
Writing On Actual Paper
To help combat the staring at a screen, I use a journal. I started writing as an adult when one day I simply just felt like writing. Like most writers, the thoughts come and go. Call it intervals of writers block or ebb and flow, I let my thoughts and will guide me.
Within the last few weeks I patiently awaited for my mind to care enough about something to write it down and share.
Keep Recognizing and Removing Those Toxins
One of the best things about giving up something toxic in our lives is the clarity that follows. Figuratively, after the removal of any toxin I can see that much straighter. Toxins will continue to come, and if we’re not careful they’ll block the important stuff. In working to recognize them and let them go, they don’t get in the way of what truly matters.