An Observation of Depression Today
Even before “Depression after scrolling” was a topic, Depression was around of course. But, I’ve noticed that it comes up a lot more than I remember in my youth. I was a 90s teen so I knew about depressive things – Kurt Cobain and alternative rock’s emotional lyrics. I may have just been a teen stuck in my own head, but I just don’t remember it being something people talked about.
Today, my high school students readily admit their struggles with Depression. It comes up regularly on popular social media feeds. Its mentioned in casual conversation. I was at a BBQ and one of my friends casually referenced her Depression. Out of a group of 8, 7 of us responded with “oh, I’ve had Depression.” It just seems to be much more prevalent today than in the past.
This observation left me with a few questions. Does Depression just appear more pervasive because social media has opened the door to talk about it? Does “being online” cause Depression? Do more people just experience bad feelings that mimic Depression after too much time scrolling? Should we blame the virtual world or our own inability to process feelings in a healthy way?
Is Social Media to Blame? Are Depression and Scrolling related?
Perhaps its true that Depression is just simply talked about more often. I can’t deny that platforms like Facebook provide a forum for us to reach out for help from others. (Whether its the best avenue to go about getting help, well that’s a different conversation.)
Frequent flyer topics when it comes to correlating social media with poor mental health include: likes, FOMO, and social comparison (you’ll get my detailed take on those later). But my own bad feelings following a newsfeed scroll made me think about how our minds may view the virtual world differently depending on how prone to Depression we are.
Who is Most Prone to Depression?
I’m no expert but there are a couple of things I do know about Depression. Some of my knowledge comes from my studies in Psychology (B.A.) and everything else is from personal experience.
My experience from talking with students and from my own struggles taught me that there are a variety of ways we can be vulnerable to Depression. Sometimes a depressive “feeling” just arrives – a chemical cause. Maybe its from lack of sun in the winter, hormonal changes, or just our brain’s chemistry. Other times it’s situational – something bad happens. Finally, our thinking may make us more susceptible – our own way of internalizing a situation or just the way we see ourselves and the world, can affect us.
“Psych 101” taught me that we are prone to Depression if we see things as they truly are. We know the ways we are imperfect and we beat ourselves up over it – a term called Depressive Realism. Others see the world, and themselves, through rose-colored glasses. If we are one who sees the world in this unfiltered way, what we do with the information is super important.
Psychologist David D. Burns‘ researched how some individuals who experienced Depression naturally tended toward distorted thinking – essentially negative thought patterns that we may not even realize we have until they are identified. And even in identifying them, they are there until we “train” them to go away.
Whether our depressive states are chemical, situational, or due to negative thinking, social media newsfeeds have got to be just about the worst thing for them. I can’t imagine that scrolling through a newsfeed and Depression don’t go hand in hand.
Being Okay with Sharing My Personal Experience With it All
I had to think back to my values to make sure sharing such a personal post was truly in alignment. Is it Honest…check! Am I sharing…yes! – most importantly its sharing just to share. A carefully constructed “relatable” post is not shared to get more likes. It’s also not as a means for getting help (okay for some, just not for me). I’m proud to be sharing for the sake of empowering others.
Sharing our demons (<— a great song for being okay with them), imperfections, and fears are really the only way we can truly connect. It strikes me how we label things we struggle with, like Depression, but the conversation ends there. We don’t talk enough about the ruminating thoughts that have the ability to rob our mind during a depressive state. For me, scrolling on social media sparked little fires in my head causing Depression and I have no shame in talking about them now.
Proof from a Case Study: Scrolling and Depression – Me, Myself, and I
I’m that person who sometimes had depressive moments because I don’t see the world through those rose-colored glasses. More ruinous, I followed up these observations of myself with negative thinking – more technically called distorted thinking. This thinking convinced me I was invaluable when I identified any flaw within myself. In discovering that I could learn to combat this type of thinking, I did the work to “fix” it by untwisting my thinking. Since I couldn’t not notice certain flaws about myself – accepting them was the next best thing – knowing that I’m flawed, but being okay with it. A strategy called the Acceptance Paradox by Burns’ Ten Days to Self-Esteem” is:
“Instead of defending yourself against your own self-criticisms. You don’t try to build yourself up or fight back. Instead, you do just the opposite: You simply accept the fact that you are broken, imperfect, and defective. You accept your shortcomings with honesty and inner peace.
I almost had this down – full acceptance of my flawed-self. I accepted that I wasn’t the most beautiful, the most intelligent, or everyone’s best friend. All it took was to quite simply, accept it. I accepted things that had ailed me for years. I was pretty much “cured.” That is until the virtual world become a thing. Social media seemed to awaken the destructive tendencies I had worked so hard to erase in “real life.”
Misery’s Search for Company
Personally, I am unfazed by obnoxious political posts, photos of beaches on the coast of somewhere beautiful, and announcements of successes and good fortune. But when I was online, I naturally focused on things that I was sensitive about in my life.
Sometimes I didn’t even know something still bothered me until I scrolled over it.
I hypothesized that our mind naturally gravitates toward posts that confirm whatever we may be struggling within our lives or about ourselves. Whatever seems to ail us is what we see. Maybe you believe everyone has a more exciting life than you. How could the “poo-poo platter” of a social media newsfeed not confirm this? Posts of others’ travel and light living are a constant reminder.
My mind had a magical way of fixating on posts that would confirm what I found imperfect about myself. When I wasn’t content with my social life – perhaps it was posts of others “friending” without me. A quick scroll showed me if they didn’t invite me or I didn’t get tagged for National Friends Day. In my darker moments, I subconsciously searched for confirmation that my thoughts and I, myself, don’t matter – an easy one to validate when enough followers didn’t like my post.
Any chance I had to disagree with myself, to “untwist” my thoughts – reminding myself that how people interact with me in the virtual world has no connection to my worth – was combatted by simply too much hard evidence on the newsfeed. It served as quick and evidence-based validation that I am flawed by comparison, thus invaluable – and that is good reason to be depressed.
And when my depressive moments were chemically based? Perhaps I could’ve mustered through those bad feelings faster had I not decided to spend my free time online searching for vindication that I should so rightfully so be depressed. I can now think of a million +1 better things to do instead of that in those moments.
So Is Social Media Dead to Me? Is There Any Hope For Co-Existing With It?
In the “real world” I got good at preparing for situations that awakened the negative thoughts that caused me to feel bad. But even though I personally have the “tool box” of strategies (and so do you!), I find applying them to the virtual world much more difficult. Social media works fast. Just a 5 second scroll doesn’t give my brain a chance to counteract the negative thought pattern. My mood could shift from neutral to irritated in 0.6 seconds. It’s hard not to see the reel of all of the input (the noise). Our brain can’t not look.
Is it worth working through that tool box all over again? Will I need to in order to be a “blogger” or can I focus on the writing and allow someone else to monitor the virtual part? Am I willing to do the work in order to fully engage in the virtual world of social media? Do I have the time and the patience to re-train my brain? I’m sure in time I’ll be motivated to do so. But the alternative of simply ignoring certain online activities altogether leaves me feeling so much lighter. I’m finding myself getting closer to a solution.
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